Dear Mr and Mrs America…

Dear Mr and Mrs America. I know you’re really busy right now, but if you have a moment, please spare a thought for all of those folk in the world to whom you are so thoughtfully providing leadership (whether we like it or not!).

   When you go to the polls on Tuesday, it’s your God-given right to elect whatever bunch of dickheads er… I mean politicians … seem to you to articulate your beliefs most closely. Now I know that Obama is a Kenyan communist Muslim hell-bent on subjecting you all to sharia law and subverting your rights to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. But he has one thing going for him that Mitt Romney doesn’t.

   Obama isn’t going to have John Bolton as his foreign policy guru.

   Now Republicans might think it’s all right to have representatives who believe  that women who suffer ‘legitimate rape’ have bodies that will deal with it, or that if a woman is raped and becomes pregnant it’s the will of God. If so, vote Romney. If you think that it’s the job of private companies to dole out health care to the healthy and ignore the sick, go for Mitt. And if you think that the rich should have their taxes cut, hey! Romney and Ryan are your boys.

(Btb if you want to know what Paul Ryan did before he was in politics, look at
He’s a nifty little mover!!)

   If on the other hand, you prefer America not to be sucked into another major war, just as you are finally getting out of the two wars that have come damn near to crippling your economy – not to mention crippling and killing so many of your armed forces – think carefully.  Whatever Romney says, John Bolton will have America, and thus the rest of us, embroiled in a new war over Iran within 12 months of a Romney presidency starting.

   Why does no-one want to intervene in Syria? Is it because we all feel that Assad is doing a good job of defending his folk against jihadi terrorists? Could it be that we all think that he’s a nice guy who should be left to sort out his own domestic difficulties? Or could it be because Syria doesn’t have the same amount of oil as Libya, and the Syrians can kill each other off without the rest of the world giving a flying fuck? Perish the thought – or rather hold on to it.

   What will happen if Israel bombs the shit out of the Iranian nuclear industry? Answer, very simply, the Iranians will close the Straits of Hormuz. For whatever length of time that is blocked, we will see oil prices go through the roof. Remember what happened in the aftermath of the last Arab-Israeli war? We’re still paying the price.  And that’ll be a disaster for the world, won’t it?

   So you have to ask the old legal question cui bono? Who benefits?

   Who benefited from the Iraq war that was going to pay for itself? Does the name ‘Haliburton’ ring a bell anyone? Or any of the myriad companies who made good dollars out of the aftermath? But hey, I hear you say. America will never invade Iran and Israel isn’t strong enough. So how would the likes of Haliburton or their heirs and successors benefit?

   The answer is quite simple. Traders in oil will join the ranks of the super wealthy for starters. Supply and demand. Super profits to be made by the canny. But the real winners will be the oil companies and their bosses and stockholders. Currently there are reserves round the world that aren’t really economically viable to develop at current prices. Double the price of a barrel of oil and hey presto! Now they are!! And since we all need fuel – for cars or transport networks or heating your house – we’ll be forced to buy, or become static, even freeze to death in the first really bad winter.

   Who is a friend of big business and the super rich?  The boy Mitt. Whose presidency would benefit from ensuring licences to go after those oil reserves that America will now need to tap? Who would be telling you all that the damage to the environment from exploiting them would be outweighed by the benefit to the country? You can guess, surely? And with those humungous tax breaks that the oil companies already enjoy… You think $3.80 a gallon is bad…?

   So please Mr and Mrs America. When you put your X on the paper, or hang your chads or whatever. Think about the price of putting John Bolton at the controls of your foreign policy.  Now I know that none of you gives a brass bugger about what happens outside your borders.  But in screwing the rest of us over by starting a new war, this swivel-eyed Geraldo Rivera lookalike and braindeadalike will be screwing you over just as hard. Do you really want to see another string of your young men and women coming home dead or damaged? And if you think that the Bush recession was bad, just wait…

   So please, if you can’t vote Obama, then vote for one of the independents. If Romney doesn’t get elected, the rest of the world will thank you most totally and sincerely. And to us outsiders, it will seem that the rights of the poor, the sick, the elderly and women in particular in America will be a little more secure! It would make the claims of politicians like Condoleeza Rice that the world needs more American leadership more credible!!

   Good luck to you on Tuesday.

    Your friend (honest!!)


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